Mentoring 101

• Why?
• Our Lent mentoring ministry exists to give kids one more adult in their lives that they can talk to, trust, and by whom to be guided in their faith journey.  In the words of Hebrews 12:1, to add to kids’ “cloud of witnesses" or simply put, their support network! 
• Mentoring is how we choose to be intentional about the more reflective season of Lent while maintaining our focus on relational ministry.
• Who?
• AAA adults! 
• Authentic – Be yourself.
• Available – Outside of church if able, but with appropriate boundaries.
• Affirming – Be a voice of encouragement & support.
• What?
• One-to-one mentoring conversations.  These will focus on relationship-building and the Lenten series theme. You will be given a discussion guide each week.
• This Lent our theme is “A Beautiful Day In the Neighborhood”.  Ash Wednesday will be a traditional service with an introduction to the theme and then we’ll spend the next five weeks hearing about the topics of difference, love, forgiveness, helpers, & being yourself.
• All mentors are mandatory reporters.  If your mentee tells you something that you think is reportable (if they seem to be a danger to themself, or others, in danger of being harmed, etc.) you must report it to Brent. 
• 
  
• When?
• Ash Wednesday, Feb. 26 – Wednesday, Apr. 1. 6:30-8:00pm
• We ask all mentors and mentees to meet on Wednesdays from 6:30-7:00 and then attend worship together at 7pm.
• Make-up sessions can be done Sunday mornings, Wednesdays before 6:30pm, or before Holy Week services (Maundy Thursday 4/9 & Good Friday 4/10).
• Where?
• Always meet at Prince of Peace. Exceptions only allowed with parental approval.  
• Check-in in the CLC before finding a place in the building to talk.

Good Practices

Helpful tips & insights from the pros at peerministry.org

Asking questions:

+Goals

-Enhance personal interest in others’ stories, thoughts, values, & feelings.

-Ask caring & meaningful questions.

-Build connections through conversation.

+While you will always have a discussion guide to go off of, you are not bound to it!

            -In your conversations, feel free to take conversation where you need it to go. The goal of mentoring is your relationship with your mentee, not covering every question on the guide.

            -Using open-ended, personally engaging questions conveys caring & a willingness to want to get to know a person. If you want to talk about something but aren’t sure, just ask “Is it okay if I ask about _____?”

            -What, How, & sometimes Why. These questions anticipate more information. Be careful with “Why” as sometimes people aren’t always sure why they feel or do something. Also, “Why” can sometimes lead to a person feeling attacked-depending on tone of voice or attitude in which it is asked.

    Listening:

+Goal, “Entering another’s world.”

                        -Listening is the ability to be with another in her or his world, attempting to experience what she or he is feeling. It takes wanting to listen; being more interested in the other than in oneself; & putting aside for the moment one’s own concerns in order to concentrate on the other person.

            +Turn off filters & break down barriers.

                        -Filters that can inhibit listening might be:

*bias toward certain people or groups

*knowledge/lack thereof about a topic or group

*personal values & beliefs

*likes & dislikes

*patience

*stress

                        -Nonverbal cues to check yourself on & watch for

                                    *Eye contact

                                    *Posture

                                    *Checking phone/watch

            +Clarify & Reflect

                        -Seek clarity when you aren’t sure what is trying to be said. Saying things like “Can you say more about that?” or “What do you mean by….?”

                        -Reflect what you’re hearing. Using phrases like, “so what I’m hearing you say is…” or “am I right in guessing that you feel…?”